Adventures in Being Myself

When your kid smiles and laughs and does cute things constantly it is extraordinarily hard to not snap photographs. These are some of my favorites from the last two weeks. This is what Zane looks like most of the time: Except when he looks like this: Or this:

PG snapped these shots last Friday, just after returning from shooting his first movie! While on set, he was able to use all of the super-cool bells & whistles on his "big" camera and fully maximize his creativity through techniques like "temperature shooting" (instead of white-balance shooting, because flash photography is a definite no-no when the panavision cameras are rolling...). These shots are an example of temperature shooting, using only ambient light and NO FLASH! It was a harmonic convergence of PG's creativity and Zane's hambone-ness.

Wow. That was fast. Z will officially be 7-months-old tomorrow. It seems like only a millisecond ago that we were in the hospital with our brand new son and, yet, the last seven months have been so full and rich that I'm certain we haven't missed a single thing. When we started this adventure, we didn't even know what we didn't know. Now we feel like we really know our son, and we're pretty sure he understands us, too. Here, then, are some new fun facts about Zane: He is the happiest and smiliest child I have ever known. He LOVES people. We will definitely have to talk with him about stranger danger, but PG and I are thrilled that our Z is a people person. He has many different variations of his smile: the wry smile; the crooked smile; the closed-mouth, thin-lipped smile; the grin; the "I-don't-know-yet-if-I-should-break-out-the-full-smile half smile;" and the wide-open-mouth smile ( he gets that from me... ) He still wears size 2 diapers, but he has s...

Exactly one year ago today I learned I was pregnant. I took an early lunch that day to run to Publix for goodies to celebrate my boss' birthday later that afternoon. I don't know why the supermarket was particularly crowded that day, at that time, or why I chose the Health & Beauty aisle to make a shortcut beeline to checkout. All I know is I casually -almost laughing! - tossed a home pregnancy test into my cart. "There is NO WAY I could be pregnant," I thought. My reasoning continued: I am on birth control, for goodness' sake, and I've NEVER had a problem! Oh, and normal events have occurred, well, normally, until June; and it's not that far past the normal time for June anyway. And, I just can't be pregnant! We just got back from a 10 day, rum-soaked vacation in the Keys! Plus, anyway, wouldn't there be SOME indication? I mean, everyone I know who has been pregnant has been terribly sick, and they are tired and food either makes them nauseate...

We reached a milestone last night: our little buddy slept in his crib, in his own room, all night. Sleeping apart was a much bigger deal for me than it was for Zane. I know it's time, and a necessary step; but, I missed him. Even though I slept well, it was the first time since learning I was pregnant that my son and I were not together during the night. I think it is common to approach parenthood determined to follow certain tenets, or to not make certain "mistakes." I know I did. During pregnancy, I had Very Definite Ideas about how to manage our baby and our sleeping arrangements. I insisted that my child would be sleeping in his own bed from Day One because co-sleeping/sleep-sharing/family beds were for airy-fairy, hippy-dippy, granola types, not highly-organized and efficient (read: control freak) people like me. But my Very Definite Ideas changed as soon as I met Zane. Parenthood instantly became an opportunity to let go of control, act instinctively and do things...

I don't know if Zane is now, officially, back on the weight chart; but I don't care. He officially weighs 14 lbs., 5 oz. He has gained 1 lb., 10 oz. since his six-month checkup . I was pretty upset two weeks ago, but I have since discovered the silver lining: the doctor's orders to add one meal of "solids" and one supplemental bottle of formula to our daily feeding schedule has resulted in a very nice daily routine that Z seems to love. We have achieved eagerness for every spoonful of food presented, with nary a pacifier in sight; and the open mouth, happily anticipating the yummy nutritional goodness, is no longer elusive. It's like a switch was flipped on and now ( dare I say it...? ) he loves to eat. He is also sleeping better. It matters not whether the restful sleep is a result of the formula itself, or if the act of drinking a bottle has become an indicator of bedtime. Whatever the reasons, Zane is a happy little kid and that makes life so much fun.